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One-liner Cash Puns. 1. Why did the wallet go to therapy? It was having some serious change management issues. 2. Don't trust people who do calculations in their head, they're always calculating how much cash you have. 3. Money talks, but all mine ever says is "Goodbye". 4. Earning money is a lot like tending a garden.17. "Some people need to learn the grains of bread puns, it's an acquired taste.". 18. "Bread puns are the ultimate slice of humor!". 19. "Bread makes everything butter, I can't be bread without it!". 20. "Life without bread is simply unloaf-able!". In conclusion, bread puns are this article's loaf language!Jokes About Money: One-Liners Need to make someone laugh fast? Then check out these one-liners! “Why is it a penny for your thoughts but you have to put …Budget Busters: Hilarious Money Jokes (One-Liner Puns) 1. I tried to save money by making my own soap, but it was a total washout. 2. I don’t trust stairs because they are always up to something. 3. I ate a clock yesterday. It was very time-consuming. 4. I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I ...After all, one can say jokes about money are always rich! 1. The dead man was not living well in the afterlife. He was dead broke. 2. Two pennies met after a long time. So, one penny said to the other penny, "Let's get together and make some cents". 3. The robber decided to take a bath before he stole from the bank.Our love is toe-tally special. I'm toe-tally lucky to know you. You're heel-ing my heart, one step at a time. Being with you is a toe-tal delight. They are toe-tally smitten. You are toe-tally the best. You're my heel-y good friend. Life with you is a toe-tal adventure. You're the sole reason I smile.Clown Jokes. A clown held a door open for me the other day. I thought, "what a nice jester". Last weekend was Halloween and my costume for this year was that of a clown, and perhaps a rather scary one. It was suggested that this would be a good topic for some one liners, so here are a few clown jokes. Don't expect them to be too funny or ...Cosmological redshift: sounds like the latest blockbuster coming to a theater near you, doesn't it? Find out what cosmological redshifts are all about. Advertisement To get a feel ...Clown Jokes One-Liners. To mix things up, we have selected our favorite clown jokes that are one-liners. Let's dive in: 21. What happened when a lion ate a clown? He felt funny. —- 22. What kind of fever did the clown have? Juggle fever. —- 23. How did the clown count his money? Pennywise. —- 24. What is a clown's outfit made of ...Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Curry Jokes I ordered a pelican curry the other night. It tasted ok but the bill was enormous.All sorted from the best by our visitors. See TOP 10 money one liners. Page 13. Search in the largest collection of one liners and puns. All one liners Choose by topic For special events New one liners. age; alcohol; ... One liner tags: money, puns, sport. 66.57 % / 64 votes. share. My parents, age 25: "We have a mortgage, a baby and a pension ...You had shoulder replacement surgery to replace the bones of your shoulder joint with artificial joint parts. The parts include a stem made of metal and a metal ball that connects ...Oct 29, 2020 · An accountant is someone who looks after the financial records of a business. We have put together asset of the finest accounting puns to be shared with all your CPA countempories in the office, enjoy! 1. When an accountant is under pressure they ask their boss to cut them sum slack. 2.The trick is to stop thinking of it as 'your' money. ~ IRS auditor. I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons. ~ Douglas Adams. Money's only something you need in case you don't die tomorrow. ~ Martin Sheen. A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. ~ George Bernard Shaw.Hilarious Money Puns. I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention. My wallet is like an onion – it makes me cry when I open it. I’m so broke, my bank account says “Empt-E”. ... Funny One Liners on Money. I’m not rich, but I’m happy. And I think that’s more important. Unless you’re a banker. Then being rich is better.Funny Money Jokes. Uber lost over a billion dollars in the last six months so they're asking their drivers to check between the seat cushions. How do dinosaurs pay their bills? With Tyrannosaurus checks! My landlord says he needs to come talk to me about how high my heating bill is.POST. #20. I live in constant fear that my kid will become a famous artist or painter and I will have thrown out about a trillion dollars of her work. Report. 9 points. POST. #21. Borrow money from pessimists, they don’t expect it back. Report.Drug one liners. Smoking will kill you... Bacon will kill you... But, smoking bacon will cure it. One liner tags: death, drug, food, health, sarcastic. 87.19 % / 3600 votes. share. I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.Funny clean jokes. 1. I have an inferiority complex, but it's not a very good one. 2. I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.Nov 12, 2020 · The trick is to stop thinking of it as ‘your’ money. – IRS auditor. A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. – Bob Hope. I live in constant fear that my kid will become a famous artist or painter and I will have thrown out about a trillion dollars of her work.Categorized as 2015, Randomness Tagged corny, corny jokes, Egg, jokes, one-liners, puns. 5 comments TRACY says: November 22, 2021 at 3:12 am. WHAT IS A TIRED HEN LAYING CHICKS? EXAUSTED! Reply. TRACY says: November 22, 2021 at 3:14 am. JESUS IS RAISEN FROM THE EASTER BASKET! SAVE THE EASTER BUNNIES! Reply.Jul 28, 2023 · It takes listeners completely by surprise and terrific way to get a quick laugh. Here are 120+ punny and funny one-liner jokes for you. Read also: 125 Relationship Quotes to Help Couples Relationships More Peaceful. 125 punny and funny one-liner jokes. 1. “Money talks. Mine always says goodbye.” 2.Blackout curtain liners are a great addition to any room, providing privacy and blocking out unwanted light. However, in order for them to fit perfectly and do their job effectivel...Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Tile Jokes Great new floor in my bathroom but you have to make sure you set them in just one direction. I got them from Harry's tiles.They don't trust anything they can't freeze. An IRS auditor is walking down the street when a mugger stops him. "Give me your money!" the mugger says. "You can't do that!" says the ...The robber retorted, "In that case, give me all my money! ... If you love one-liners, these short jokes will be right up your alley. Originally Published: April 11, 2019 Author.Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Mouse Jokes Spotted a mouse in the house. I took a photo, and although he didn't say cheese, I could tell he was thinking it.Here is a list of the best travel jokes you can use the next time you visit Japan. 1. After taking 4 hours to check out of my hotel in Japan, the receptionist said, "You really Tokyo time.". 2. One of my friends got lost while touring Tokyo. Turns out it was all Ja-plan.111 Funny Mermaid Puns and One-Liners June 4, 2021 February 17, 2021 | Sonja. Here you find my favorite mermaid puns and one-liners. I compiled a list of the best puns I found on the internet as well as my own ones. ... Where does a mermaid keep her money? A: In a river-bank. Q: What do you call a mermaid who likes to hunt small fish and sleeps ...Apr 15, 2022 · Monopoly Jokes. I was playing Bonopoly earlier. It's like Monopoly but where the streets have no name. This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Monopoly Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…. Went to a Board Game themed Fancy Dress competition, but knew I wasn’t going to win with my incomplete ...Dec 26, 2022 · Here are 75 funny money jokes and the best money puns to crack you up. These jokes about money are great money jokes for kids and adults alike. Here is our top list of money dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about money, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this money humor with others. Jump to: Money puns; Money one liners; Best money jokesGoing through some old pages, I spotted that Elvis comes up frequently, so here are lots of those puns and one liners collated as a collection of Elvis jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…. I lost my pet mouse Elvis the other night. He was caught in a trap. Tried to book tickets for an Elvis tribute night ...11 Clean One Liner Jokes. "Money talks. But all mine ever says is goodbye.". "A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.". "Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.". "A computer once beat me at chess.Funny one liners. Time may be a great healer but it's also a lousy beautician. One liner tags: beauty, life. 93.37 % / 2118 votes. share. It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim. One liner tags: animal, attitude, life. 93.25 % / 1967 votes.Feb 15, 2024 · A money pun is a type of pun that uses money-related words or phrases to create a funny or witty statement. Money puns can be as simple as a one-liner or as complex as a whole joke. They are a great way to break the ice, lighten the mood, and add some humor to a serious topic such as personal finance.71. "Buffet" is a French word that means "get up and get it yourself.". 72. Winter: the season when we try to keep the house as hot as it was in the summer, when we complained about the ...The Beginnings of Bonsai: Bonsai History - Bonsai history is extensive and varied. Learn where bonsai originated, where it ended up and how it became a popular form of gardening. A...19. Have a grate birthday. Hope that's not too cheesy. 20. Happy birthday, best-tea! 21. You're old, but I do not carrot all. 22. Raisin a toast for your birthday.Other Money Jokes. Money Joke One-Liners and Puns 56. Finance Joke – Big Test; 57. Money Joke – 3 Questions; Money Jokes – Quotes, Jokes, and One-Liners on Personal Finance Money Jokes: On Relationships and Marriage. There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage.Oct 23, 2023 · Skunk Jokes: 45 Rib-Tickling Puns & One-Liners That’ll Make You Scent-sational. Ahoy, joke lovers! You know, skunks aren’t just about that unmistakable aroma; they’ve got a funny side too. Dive in for a whiff of these hilarious skunk jokes that are bound to tickle your funny bone and maybe, just maybe, make you rethink the next time you ...These puns, riddles, and one-liners will crack up kids and adults. By Erin Cavoto Published: Jul 16, 2021. Save Article. It's never too early to start preparing for Halloween. There's a lot to do, after all! You have to come up with clever Halloween costumes, stock up on candy, and watch all your favorite scary movies to get in the spooky mood ...One-liner Finance Puns. 1. I'm good at counting money because I'm a "centsible" person. 2. Investors are always in good "bonds" with their money. 3. The stock market can be quite the "bear" to deal with. 4. I'm never bored when talking about finance - it always "interests" me. 5.95 Intelligence One Liners - The funniest intelligence jokes - OneLineFun.com. You take away the looks, money, intelligence, charm and success and, really, there's no real difference between me and George Clooney. One liner tags: beauty, intelligence, life, money, sarcastic. 91.67 % / 2422 votes. share.Nov 3, 2022 · These corny one-liners about Christmas trees, holiday foods and winter staples are truly a gift. Nov. 3, 2022, 5:16 PM UTC / Updated Dec. 4, 2023, 6:43 PM UTC By Caithlin Pena and Sarah Lemire54 Lobster Puns One Liner. July 8, 2023 by Jokes Garage. Welcome to the ocean of laughter and crustacean wordplay! Get ready to dive into a sea of punny goodness with our topic of the day: Lobster Puns. These delightful wordplay creations are guaranteed to make you crack a smile, or should we say a claw?Turkey Puns. Turkin' 9 to 5 ; Turkey trot like it's hot. "Hey I just met you, and this is gravy, but here's my stuffing, so carve me maybe." "My family told me to stop telling Thanksgiving jokes, but I said I couldn't quit cold turkey."September 16, 2023. We have gathered 100 funny money jokes, hilarious one liners, and the best money puns to cheer you up. These money jokes are perfect for both children …I would tell you about my dream involving a Lion, a Witch and a Wardrobe, but it's Narnia business. I had a a recurring dream about being in a restaurant with two friends when the bill came to £100. We split it. It was £33.33333333333….. A friend is convinced that everyone dreams in black and white. I told him I dream in colour, he told ...Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Mouse Jokes Spotted a mouse in the house. I took a photo, and although he didn't say cheese, I could tell he was thinking it.Puns And One Liners. Check our Twitter and Facebook feeds for a joke on the hour every hour… Menu Close Indexes; 2023; 2022; 2021; 2020; 2019; 2018; 2017; 2016; 2015; 2014; 2013; Fire Jokes Someone threw my 70s records on the fire. It was a disco inferno.Cashing In on Humor: Bank Puns Worth the Investment. 1. Money talks, but all mine says is ‘goodbye.’ 2. When it comes to loans, the bank has interest in your interest. 3. A penny for your thoughts – too bad the bank charges a processing fee. 4. Some say love is the best investment, but it has too many withdrawals for my liking. 5.One-liner stock market jokes. Women and stock markets have one thing in common: if you don't pull out in time, you end up losing a lot of money. It is only in the stock market where you can buy chicken broth in bulk. I have a very honorable and courteous friend, but he hates the stock market, so the other day I asked him why he hates the ...This week’s puns and one liners take the form of Dog Jokes. As always, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…. A friend’s dog swallowed a cushion. The vet has described its condition as comfortable. Friend’s dog just got a place in a canine display team. It wasn’t easy, he had to jump through hoops to get it.The largest collection of car one-line jokes in the world. All sorted from the best by our visitors. ... See TOP 10 car one liners. Page 3. Search in the largest collection of one liners and puns. All one liners Choose by topic For special events New one liners. age; ... One liner tags: car, money, puns. 71.52 % / 72 votes. share.24 New Year One Liners - The funniest New Year jokes - OneLineFun.com. My New Year's resolution is to help all my friends gain ten pounds so I look skinnier. One liner tags: fat, friendship, New Year. 76.81 % / 781 votes. My resolution was to read more so I put the subtitles on my tv.17. "Some people need to learn the grains of bread puns, it's an acquired taste.". 18. "Bread puns are the ultimate slice of humor!". 19. "Bread makes everything butter, I can't be bread without it!". 20. "Life without bread is simply unloaf-able!". In conclusion, bread puns are this article's loaf language!Paddy O'Furniture - a funny play on Irish names. Credit: Unsplash/ Priscilla Du Preez. Kicking off our list of funniest and best Irish one-liners is this hilarious play on words. Paddy, or Patrick, is a popular Irish name, and you won't be hard-pushed to find an Irish person whose surname begins with 'O'. 9....